Presumbly a TAFE or Uni student in a kitchenware shop in the CBD looking at various knives in showcase. Loudly to his friend who is somewhere else in the shop:
"Stop making me look at the Shun knives [friend's name]. They're giving me a stiffy!"
"Stop making me look at the Shun knives [friend's name]. They're giving me a stiffy!"
At a pet store today.
Noticably angry male: These stupid pet shops, makin' up all these dumb names for animals. What the hell is this breed? Never even heard of it. Not even a real dog.
Noticably angry male's girlfriend: Stupid.
After they left I looked at the dog in question - it was a Catahoula x Mastiff.
Noticably angry male: These stupid pet shops, makin' up all these dumb names for animals. What the hell is this breed? Never even heard of it. Not even a real dog.
Noticably angry male's girlfriend: Stupid.
After they left I looked at the dog in question - it was a Catahoula x Mastiff.
Overheard in Bayswater on Tuesday.
Boy: Guess what the main ingredient in perfume is?
Girl 1: What?
Boy: Whale vomit!
Girl 2: What?
Girl 1: Whale vomit? Can whales even vomit?
Boy: Guess what the main ingredient in perfume is?
Girl 1: What?
Boy: Whale vomit!
Girl 2: What?
Girl 1: Whale vomit? Can whales even vomit?
Also at 7/11 Day.
Girl 1: I'm buying a large slurpie
Girl 2: But it's a free small.
Girl 1: I'm not saying "Happy 7/11 Day to a cashier who doesn't care to get a free slurpie.
Girl 2: Well, I'll suffer the indigence if it's free,
Girl 1 gets a large cup: Unhappy 7/11 Day
***
And at the supermarket.
Aisle Whatever, looking for snail bait, girl trying to flirt with store clerk.
Store Clerk: I should be able to see it. I have my glasses. I tried contacts, but I have FLAT eyes.
Girl: I HAVE TRIANGLE EYES!
Heard this at Kilsyth/Croydon 7/11 on Mt Dandenong Road during "Free Slurpie Day"
Mother, taking camera phone picture of kids next to 7/11 Day Free Slurpie sign.
"Smile, or you won't be on Facebook."
... I don't even...
Mother, taking camera phone picture of kids next to 7/11 Day Free Slurpie sign.
"Smile, or you won't be on Facebook."
... I don't even...
At work in the city my colleague's first customer of the day:
"I'm after a juicer."
"What sort/type?"
[pause] "Zzzt! Zzzt!"
"Electrical?"
"Yes."
"I'm after a juicer."
"What sort/type?"
[pause] "Zzzt! Zzzt!"
"Electrical?"
"Yes."
A customer was telling a co-worker today about an encounter she had at the Vic Market with another older woman of similar vintage. The customer said to the stall holder, a sweet looking elderly lady, something like "Packing up after a busy day eh?" to which the old lady replied "No, I'm fucking tap dancing!". I laughed rather loudly :}
At Melbourne Central on Thursday. Waiting on platform 3 and 4.
"Upfield service delayed 5 minutes. Now arriving platform 12"
I wonder if platform 12 is anything like platform 9 3/4...
"Upfield service delayed 5 minutes. Now arriving platform 12"
I wonder if platform 12 is anything like platform 9 3/4...
- Mood:
cold
On the West Preston tram.
Two drunk guys talking.
Guy 1: 'Mate, your worst quality is how badly you describe movies. you fuck up the plot, get the actors names wrong and give the endings away, I love you mate and I am happy for you to talk, just don't expect me to listen"
Guy 2:... (Dead silence)
Me: (Stifling a laugh and failing)
Two drunk guys talking.
Guy 1: 'Mate, your worst quality is how badly you describe movies. you fuck up the plot, get the actors names wrong and give the endings away, I love you mate and I am happy for you to talk, just don't expect me to listen"
Guy 2:... (Dead silence)
Me: (Stifling a laugh and failing)
- Mood:
amused - Music:Vultures of Venus
Page Summary
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ladymeerkat : (no subject) [+0] - ohfaceplant : (no subject) [+0]
- karishna : (no subject) [+10]
- denni_payne : Indignant [+1]
- denni_payne : Parenting Skills 101 [+1]
- ladymeerkat : Brain juice needed [+3]
- firecausesburns : (no subject) [+0]
- ladymeerkat : (no subject) [+0]
- harmonybear : And these guys run our trains? [+7]
- nintendo_slut : (no subject) [+2]
